Tools

This morning, as I was standing at the end of the X-ray machine at LAX with my pants falling down waiting to retrieve my shoes and belt, the airport security guy asked if he could inspect my bag. "Of course," I say.

"What's this?"

"That's a drum key"

"What's it do?"

"It's a tool for tightening drum heads"

"And I know this is an allen wrench"

"Yup"

"You can't bring that on the plane"

"Why?"

"Because there are no tools allowed on the plane"

"Can I bring the drum key?"

"Yes"

"Well, that's a tool ... what's the difference?"

(pause)

"Sir, you can't bring the allen wrench on the plane. Would you like to check it?"

"That's ridiculous"

"If you'd like to check your bag, you can keep the tool"

"I don't want to check my bag"

"Well, if you want to keep the tool, you have to check your bag"

"That tool was in my bag when I flew down here"

"Well, they must have missed it"

"... whatever ... Have you ever flown on a plane?"

"Yes, why?"

"How is that possible?"

"Sir?"

"Well, because you're a tool"


...


Actually, what I said was, "Nothing, keep the tool," but they got the picture.

Airport security has become ludicrous. I can show you 10 ways a ball point pen is more dangerous than an Allen wrench. And did you know that you can bring ammunition on the plane in your bag, but not a brand new zippo lighter that has never been filled with lighter fluid? Surely, there's a better way we can be spending our money than to make sure allen wrenches don't make it onto our airlines. I give up.

Might I also suggest not timing your return to the Oakland Airport Bart station right when several thousand Oakland A's fans are getting out of the colliseum.

Do I sound bitter?

No, just tired. I actually had a great time at the SIOP Conference, but I'll have to write about that later. It was nice to be immersed in my field for a few days and still have time to hang out with friends. I'll update you soon on what I've been learning about my career path and all the other fun things I did in LA. Now I have to get back to the reality known as homework ... which isn't so bad seen from the perspective of where it will take me.

drumroll please ....

What's this? Blogging on a Friday night? I must be grad student.

I'm thinking about posting this in the local paper:
Lost: One social life. Last seen in the SF Bay area cavorting around with friends ... laughing, drinking, getting involved in three too many things at once. Generally well liked and well mannered. Answers to the name "hotstuff". If found, please cuddle and tell him it'll all be okay one of these days. Return to me by June 2006.

I've been all out of sorts lately with this mysterious cold. It was symptomless for the first 4 days - I only felt this eerie fatigue and spacy-ness. The last two days my energy has returned some, but I have this faint sore throat. It's like I have a ghost of a cold. I really hope it goes away soon. Anyone know an exorcist? Does Nyquil make a rememedy for curing the undead?

I haven't been writing in here much mostly because I don't have much to say ... unless you want to hear about goal setting, goal commitment, self regulation of goal setting, the benefits of writing or motivation (among other things). It seems to be one of those things that is interesting to many, but not really a hot conversation piece.

Oh ... I can tell you that I'm in love. She's beautiful. A black goddess. Yes, that's right ... I received my new Nikon D70 DSLR last week. I love love love this camera. I must thank the US government for somehow giving me 4 times the tax return I expected and, of course, if you receive money that you didn't know you were getting you have to spend it, right? Right!

I'm still trying to sell my bitchin' Nikon FM2 35mm camera to help defray the costs - so if you know anyone who's in the market, send them my way. I just can't justify owning 3 cameras, so one has got to go. But not my D70 ... no ... she's my precioussssssssss. Yes, precioussssssssss.

Is such a great love for an inanimate object wrong? I think not.

So that's it. That is all I have to say tonight. Rather boring I suppose. I was hoping my 100th blog post would be more ... well ... monumental. But no. No major milestones here. Perhaps I'll celebrate my 101st blog post instead! Yeah! I'll even take pictures with my new camera and post them. Pictures of ... pictures of ... my homework!

Sigh.