hot metal! oh, yeah!

what's hotter than a leather-clad angelina jolie wielding a riding crop?

hot metal, that's what.

really hot metal. like molten metal hot.

what's this got to do with anything?

i learned how to weld yesterday. it was ... hawt!

the best part? i still have all my fingers and toes!

i have some crazy friends who are building a cathedral on the playa this year for burning man. in exchange for some help, they've been teaching people how to weld. yesterday i was working on a few of the steel trusses that will make the arches in the center of the 40ft. structure. (see below)





welding is certainly both a skill and an artform. i'm actually pretty good at it for a first time welder and am interested to learn more and create my own thinga-ma-bob someday. hell, even using the plasma cutter to cut out designs in the burn barrels looked fun!

oh yeah, and women in welding gear? ..... hot!

dear blog

dear blog,

what can i say? life is good these days. there continues to be so much up in the air and i'm a little worried about finding a good job soon, but i know it will all come about as it should.

the past weekend was one of the best i can remember in recent months. it's hard to believe that just a few months ago i was wondering how i was going to make it to the next day and then noticing myself in a time where i wanted every second to last forever. it occurs to me that this is the type of thing i would write had i just fallen in love, but that's not it. in fact, it's probably better than that because the joy i'm feeling is intrinsic rather than a result of any other person coming into my life.

so what was this past weekend all about? it was the 7th annual campout event that the rhythm society has created. i co-lead the event with my partner in crime, shanti. we had a stellar team that allowed me to trust them so much that i was able to let go of being "on" all the time and, for the first time, was able to relax for most of the event and play and interact without the nagging feeling that i should be checking on something. i felt at peace.

in addition to that, it felt so good to have created an event where, everywhere you looked, there were people laughing and smiling and dancing and the air was just filled with joy and openness and freedom - freedom from stress, from worry, from tension. i met some amazing people and connected with others that i have known peripherally for a long time, but have never really spoken with at length.

i also got treated like a king a few times. thursday night i was given a shoulder and neck massage by one friend while being fed pie by another. saturday afternoon i was given an hour and half long massage during which a second massuese joined in. 4 hand massage? booyah!

it was also a very musical weekend for me. on friday, i played my drum kit along with a DJ for awhile. on saturday, i participated in a small, impromptu drum circle that drew a small crowd of dancers, poi spinners and hula-hoopers. later that night, i played my kit again with a small unpracticed band while the masses (200+ people) ate dinner on the lawn. and on sunday i DJ'd for the first time. that was the most fun of all ... playing music i love (really loud!) for dozens of naked people dancing and swimming and lounging around the pond. a few people even came up to me to tell me it was their favorite DJ set of the weekend. oh my!

the land up at camp and sons is blessed. i noticed that as soon as i arrived, i relaxed and felt an innate sense of peace and joy. they've done a lot to infuse the land with creativity, positivity and love. jane and walter are very generous and gracious hosts and i am thankful that we found them so many years ago and continue to return each year.

i think the best part of the weekend overall was how well i dealt with the parts of me that get down on myself about certain things. i was fairly easily able to cast those thoughts aside and just 'be'. that felt good.

well, as is usual, i tend to poop out on writing before all my thoughts are expressed and, well, you'll just have to deal. the weather has been outrageously gorgeous this past week and it's just too damn nice to sit inside and type at a computer ...

another

wow, what a couple of weeks it’s been since maine. Busy busy busy. I love it and it bothers me. I love how much I can accomplish when I am pressed to the wire with commitments. I tend to be so much more productive when I have less time to get things done. Generally, i excel like this when it has to do with planning and coordinating something because I'm so good at it – it’s less easy when things are unfamiliar to me, but I’m working on that. It bothers me because I tend to not do as well taking care of myself (taking time to slow down, relax, get outside, etc.), and I’m working on that too! Balance. It’s all about balance!

These past several weeks have been spent planning Jon’s bachelor’s party (where *do* you find 100 chickens and bulk honey for less than $500???) and the Rhythm Society 3-day campout event at camp and sons. I always forget the massive amount of tiny fires that surface when an event draws near. But I love it because I feel capable in handling them and dealing with it. My goal is to always treat the people I am working with with respect, trust and maintaining an environment of fun collaboration and inspiration toward creating something that others will enjoy and get something meaningful from.

I find when I start generating this kind of energy, more is drawn to me.

That’s what needs to happen in the dating realm, I think. I’ve been dating a lot over the past couple months, but haven’t really felt like anything is being created from that. I’ve had a lot of fun with the various women I’ve been out with and am looking forward to other potential dates. Dating is a new thing for me in my life; I’ve always been a relationship guy. So I am finding that it’s difficult to find ease around being in the space of dating and not getting wrapped up in stupid questions or games. I feel like I am doing fairly well with it all, and yet I am challenged by taking on the role of the pursuer. It's been nice to take a little break these past two weeks as i've been so busy with everything else. i find i want the companionship and intimacy, but not the hurdles to get there. not that i want to bypass the "getting to know you phase" - i like that - i just don't like the part before that when you're trying to figure out if you want to get into the "getting to know you phase."

and this is the part of the post where my desire to write has gone kaput ... before all things in my head have been said.

oh well. motivation - she is a fickle beast.