another

wow, what a couple of weeks it’s been since maine. Busy busy busy. I love it and it bothers me. I love how much I can accomplish when I am pressed to the wire with commitments. I tend to be so much more productive when I have less time to get things done. Generally, i excel like this when it has to do with planning and coordinating something because I'm so good at it – it’s less easy when things are unfamiliar to me, but I’m working on that. It bothers me because I tend to not do as well taking care of myself (taking time to slow down, relax, get outside, etc.), and I’m working on that too! Balance. It’s all about balance!

These past several weeks have been spent planning Jon’s bachelor’s party (where *do* you find 100 chickens and bulk honey for less than $500???) and the Rhythm Society 3-day campout event at camp and sons. I always forget the massive amount of tiny fires that surface when an event draws near. But I love it because I feel capable in handling them and dealing with it. My goal is to always treat the people I am working with with respect, trust and maintaining an environment of fun collaboration and inspiration toward creating something that others will enjoy and get something meaningful from.

I find when I start generating this kind of energy, more is drawn to me.

That’s what needs to happen in the dating realm, I think. I’ve been dating a lot over the past couple months, but haven’t really felt like anything is being created from that. I’ve had a lot of fun with the various women I’ve been out with and am looking forward to other potential dates. Dating is a new thing for me in my life; I’ve always been a relationship guy. So I am finding that it’s difficult to find ease around being in the space of dating and not getting wrapped up in stupid questions or games. I feel like I am doing fairly well with it all, and yet I am challenged by taking on the role of the pursuer. It's been nice to take a little break these past two weeks as i've been so busy with everything else. i find i want the companionship and intimacy, but not the hurdles to get there. not that i want to bypass the "getting to know you phase" - i like that - i just don't like the part before that when you're trying to figure out if you want to get into the "getting to know you phase."

and this is the part of the post where my desire to write has gone kaput ... before all things in my head have been said.

oh well. motivation - she is a fickle beast.